Lifestyle Arbitrage

(Very) Rough Update

July 27th, 2009 Posted in News Release | No Comments »

Danger called an emergency meeting, and then didn’t show up.

Tank is driving through North Dakota eating Arby’s.

Konrad recently aged 10 years by simultaneously taking a real job and moving in with his girlfriend.

Seth is clubbing again.

Seth’s Reflection of the Day

March 21st, 2009 Posted in Bars, General Thoughts | No Comments »

In night clubs there are two types of people: fun-givers and fun-takers.

Fun-givers are the beautiful girls, the big spending guys and the crazy personalities.

Fun-takers stand on the wall and watch.

Good promoters recruit the fun-givers.  Fun-takers wait in line outside.

Moral of the story - don’t be a fun-taker.

The Tank and the Hoff Go Antiquing On Charles Street

March 17th, 2009 Posted in Bars, Meeting Minutes | No Comments »

The PlayFutbol branch of DLab reunited for an afternoon lunch at the Beacon Hill Bistro on Thursday, March 5th. After the Tank established and checked with members of staff that there was no gas leak lunch was served. An exchange with the waiter regarding our drink order ensued and was handled gracefully without eviction from the premises.

Staff:   Would the gentlemen like a drink with your food?
Playfutbol: Yes please, the French chardonnay.
Staff:  One glass of chardonnay coming up right away
Playfutbol Oi, make that two bottles please.

Careers, love, the state of the union as well as past anecdotes were discussed. Action items included the upcoming reunion in Europe and the ransom for John. Despite the fact that there were no arguments about Kelly the bill was not split. That and the fact that the Hoff made his flight back to Germany indicates strong personal learning along the original Dlab objectives. There was no nudity or public urination reported on Charles Street that afternoon.

Dating Beyond 30

March 17th, 2009 Posted in Girls | No Comments »

Transcript from what started as a seemingly innocent skype conversation…

[3/13/2009 2:27:05 PM] Natasha : great!)
[3/13/2009 2:27:08 PM] Natasha : u have a minute?
[3/13/2009 2:27:34 PM] Natasha : airberlin flight would cost 100 euros instead of Lufthansa 100euros
[3/13/2009 2:27:40 PM] Natasha : 200
[3/13/2009 2:27:57 PM] Natasha : may i ask u stupid question
[3/13/2009 2:28:11 PM] the hoff: of course
[3/13/2009 2:28:24 PM] Natasha : very stupid, don’t think badly
[3/13/2009 2:29:45 PM] Natasha : my european DNI card finishes in November this year(((     could u marry me and then divorce soon (for visa reasons)?
[3/13/2009 2:30:02 PM] Natasha : NIE card, identification
[3/13/2009 2:31:23 PM] the hoff: well
[3/13/2009 2:31:30 PM] the hoff: we can discuss when i am over
[3/13/2009 2:31:53 PM] the hoff: but originally i was hoping i could marry for love
[3/13/2009 2:32:04 PM] the hoff: which is part of the reason i have waited for so long
[3/13/2009 2:32:24 PM] Natasha : I am sure we could combine both
[3/13/2009 2:32:53 PM] Natasha : I am a good girl and VER KIND and GENEROUS, I will never blackmail you and nothing lke that
[3/13/2009 2:33:36 PM] the hoff: ahah
[3/13/2009 2:33:42 PM] the hoff: i know

Especially impressive is the 81 second pause between the question and the response.  Not sure what Hoff was thinking right there, but it seems he may have dodged this bullet.

Open Letter to Danger

February 21st, 2009 Posted in General Thoughts | No Comments »

So-  It’s been over a year since D-Lab posted here - and a lot has happened… so a real quick summary.  Everyone graduated from business school.  Tank convinced some hot chic to move with him to Chicago where he has been working for a large energy conglomerate, Hoff moved to Munich to renovate his fathers house and send resumes around Europe, Danger moved to London to work for a large real estate private equity group, and I’ve been in New York trying to boot strap a custom clothing company.

Although physically separated, DLAB is in many ways still together. The lessons of life continue to baffle us though.  It recently came to our attention that Danger may have lost his way.  For several months, he has not had a single story worth sharing - the following letter is for him.

TO: The man formerly known as “Danger”

FR: Coach Seth

Danger Victim Nice Guy,

I have thoughts about your current situation.  It’s in my nature to try and help.  Even if said help only does more damage.  But I’m usually right - as verified recently by Tank’s doctor (see - yoga does NOT burn calories!).

If DLAB had a charter - I think it would go something like this:

To avoid mediocrity and tirelessly strive for either massive success or massive failure in the following areas of life:
Professional Achievement
, Physical Fitness, Sexual Conquest (or at least one - cause life get’s busy…

So - What the hell is going on out there?  What went wrong?  Are you depressed?  Why are you letting this happen?  (Shhhh - these are rhetorical)

Ten facts:

  1. You are a handsome man.
  2. You are charismatic
  3. You are smart.
  4. You are in the prime of your life.
  5. You have a respectable job.
  6. You make good money.
  7. You have a hot girlfriend.
  8. Your parents love you.
  9. You live in a cool city.
  10. You’re fucking Danger!

SO!  WTF?!? Why are you feeling sorry for yourself?  Getting fat watching television?  Boring, predictable couples dinner conversation?  That shit will make you impotent!  You must take action!

I’d suggest one or all of the following:

  • Take on way more than you can handle at (large unnamed PE firm), work 18 hours a day and make a real name for yourself quick -or get fired in flames
  • Join an intramural sports team (football, rugby, cricket, wtv)
  • Dedicate at least one night a week where you go out to the pub with guys from work/building/not-b-school people sans-girl friend
  • Cancel your cable television and sell your lazy-boy
  • Set a physical challenge - marathon, climb the Matterhorn, swim the channel, something hard
  • Network (, take business cards, follow up, meet for lunch
  • Drink more coffee and more beer

BTW - this talk would be a lot more effective with shots of Tequila at Unico and, if necessary, that will be arranged.



Up into the Andes

January 23rd, 2008 Posted in Argentina, Travel Logistics | No Comments »

We continued our road-trip up into the Andes Mountains going as far as the Chilean border, where we were promptly refused entry and turned around.  Views of Mt. Aconcagua and the Andes were simply amazing.

Tank gave Brigitta just what she wanted for her Birthday - with Mt. Aconcagua in the background!


Frequent pit-stops were necessary


Hoff supported the local community by investing in a new T-Shirt


D-Lab enjoyed the perfect weather in the Andes

Road Trip in Mendoza

January 20th, 2008 Posted in Argentina, Travel Logistics | No Comments »


Megusta Pollo!


Yes, there was some mooning action… unfortunately, we got so excited about mooning a car as we overtook them that we missed our Winery and drove a further 15 km before we turned around!

Wine Tasting at Andeluna

January 20th, 2008 Posted in Argentina | No Comments »


Simply awesome stuff. The Hoff seems to have quite a knack for this kind of thing… Years of experience and training paying off…


Miles of green vineyard, with the beautiful backdrop of the Andes mountains!

Happy Birthday Brigitta!

Barefoot Drunk Soccer

January 20th, 2008 Posted in Argentina | No Comments »

Slightly disappointed that the hostels pool was closed at 7pm, D-Lab was left with no ther option but to drink several liters of Andes beer sitting on park benches… Things were starting to feel a bit dull, when some local guys invited us to join in on their pickup soccer game.  Slightly drunk and without shoes, D-Lab rose to the challenge - splitting between Auburn St. and Mt. Vernon plus Brigitta.  We’re not sure who actually won the match, but highlights include Tank scoring a goal with Seth as keeper followed by a pretty embarrassing victory dance, Seth severely fouling one of the smaller Argentinian players and nearly being red-carded, Danger, assisted by Tank, scoring a goal against Mt. Vernon, Seth throwing a stray dog into the goal posts, Brigitta with a beautiful cross to Maxy (one of our Argentinan players), and Seth scoring a goal on Danger in the final minute of the game…

Bribery and Extortion

January 20th, 2008 Posted in Argentina, Travel Logistics | No Comments »

Hoff and car

The road trip begins, we hit the road at 10 am, and are quickly lost. After going several kilometers in the wrong direction asking for directions and turning around, we find ourselves being flagged over by a police officer. Apparently it is illegal to drive in Argentina with your lights off… The friendly police officer explained to Hoff and Seth that for violating this law, we were required to pay a ticket of $555.43 pesos. According to the law, we needed to go straight to the bank and pay the fine. Luckily for us, he was willing to let us avoid the hassle of going to the bank and continue our trip without paying any pesos… this of course would require a small tip… Although D-Lab officially has a zero tolerance policy to extortion by armed public officers we made a small exception offered 100 pesos and rolled on…